Wow, it's been a long time since I've updated. Since Chirstmas! I was so depressed then. Things were really bad then. Everything seems to be getting better now. Even if it's not, we're moving to Yellowstone!!! That makes everything so much brighter! I can't wait! Pat is transfering to Boisie so we will definately be staying up north. Even though we're going to be in Wyoming, Boisie is only six or seven hours away and we only have to go once a month (and the guard pays for it, to some extent). I thought it was crazy to drive that far for drill but Pat said there are guys that he works with that drive up here from Dallas. DALLAS!!! That is madness. I think Dallas is farther away than seven hours, but I could be wrong. Anyhow, we're leaving April 23rd. So, if you want to hang out with me you better schedual a time! Ha. 

OH, so, I'm making a myspace page. I wasn't going to but I was trying to find someone for a friend and I found an old friend on there who I was once very close to. So now I will give in to the dark side. I don't know why I've always thought of myspace as a dark and evil place. I don't think it is, Pat has a myspace page and I love him. Anyhow, I have to fill out all of this stuff about myself and I don't want to. It makes me feel so dorky. I don't know why it makes me feel that way, it just does. I guess it's ok because I really am a dork. It can't be helped. So if you have a myspace come be my friend.

And, I have a new email address it's lemurmarie@yahoo.com there is a funny story behind it but you don't get to here that right now.

I can't sleep. When I lay in bed all I can think about is weird things from my childhood. Things I rarely ever think about, like when we were living with Debbie. I was in 8th grade and charlie was in 9th, we would take quarters out of Dad and Debbie's room. We took them for lunch because we were only allowed like 1.50 a day or something like that. We always thought the money was our dad's, and he never cared if we  took his leftover change, but the money was actually Debbie's. About two months after we had stopped taking the money Debbie made a big deal about us "stealing" (note, we never thougth of it as stealing) from her. My dad of course got really pissed off at us and when he ask us about it I lied and said I had no part in it. Charlie, being my older brother, just took the blame for it.   My dad made Charlie put his hand on the table while he hit it repeatedly with his leather belt. Charlie moved his hand when my dad went to hit him the second time and dad hit himself which pissed him off more so he hit him harder. It was a bad deal and he made me watch. He said if I moved he would do the same to me. I was so freaked out. It still freaks me out for some reason.

I've always thought of my dad as a good man.

 Things in my life are going rather poorly right now.  Short of something happening to Pat or someone dying I don't know how it could get much worse. Although, that's what I thought right after I got kicked out of my dad's house. When I was living in my apartment, unable to afford much food, I barely had enough gas to make it to work and I could very rarely go to church.